in muse... part 2

hi everyone! hope you all had a very merry christmas, stoning in front of the telly or party hopping. i love christmas, especially the christmases i've spent in my family's previous house. being a smaller space, i'd wake up to roasting turkey and i guess that's pretty much the superficial part of christmas to me. seeing the presents pile up below the tree. the presents have significantly decreased in quantity but increased in quality and the tree has been given away since we've all grown older and much lazier.

parties have indeed increased in number over the years, so does the alcohol consumption as i get increasingly older, particularly champagne and red wines. i've started eating much less during this period since lunch and dinner's set aside for even more feasting. i'm often seen making numerous trips to the buffet table picking on the turkey breast and giving myself generous amounts of apple and cranberry sauce (yum yum yum!). i've since learnt the art of talking to much older people about the most matured things on earth. as i get older i find myself sitting at the adult's table and engaging people in conversations while sipping wine and giving useless opinions of it. speaking of which, it makes me rather depressed......................

well, blame it on my inability of remembering anything remotely french or exotic, and my very badly trained palette. or maybe my spoilt palette since i go around eating so much nonesense that affects my taste. hur hur hur. as i get older i feel the pressure to pick up golf, join them in wine sessions, cook and whip up all sorts of food, appreciate all sorts of cheese and/or do something that my parents can sing praises of... and at this age i am indeed living in my younger sister's shadow. a younger sister who isn't exactly great at academics but managed to excel first as a waitress then a wine consultant and get into such a prestigeous school. it sucks when every convo somehow revolves around me spending so much and it makes me seem superficial and useless.

i have decided to make a mark today!

stop laughing im serious.

WHATEVER IT IS i really love christmas, although it can be depressing (as you have already seen). last night i went for midnight mass with daryl's family. my second time going for such an event and i must say that the second time really made me see the light. i have no idea how people can actually do it ritually but it's really SO meaningful to me. at 11.30pm on christmas eve the choir leads us in singing slow and sad carols, seemingly to await Christ's birth. and around 12mn the mass begins and it gets a little happier when we are lead to sing carols like adeste fideles and what child is this. its amazing what lyrics and carols can do when you actually think about it. hmmm. and of course it all ends with a bang, all joyous and celebratory with joy to the world. then i found out that the catholic church's calendar actually begins and ends each christmas, so staying awake on the eve is actually significant and once it crosses to midnight we rejoice and thank the Lord for Jesus's birth.

i guess it really drives in the meaning of Christmas to me. maybe because i never quite thought about it or celebrated it on such a scale. yes, we do sing carols in church and stuff but really nothing like this...

just a thought.